Practical Self Care for Broke, Exhausted Moms

These practical self care tips for moms are quick, affordable, and easy. Self-care doesn't need to be time-consuming or expensive!

"My husband and I both work, but money is still tight." That's a sentence could truthfully be said by 90% of my mom friends right now, including myself. It's a statement that describes life for a lot of moms across America.

We're tired. We're running on fumes. And when we run into people we love, they say "take care of yourself, ok?" with that slightly-concerned look. They mean it well, but what we hear is "Wow, do you look old and run-down!"

So we tell ourselves it doesn't matter, but still somehow end up googling "self-care tips for busy moms". But here's the thing...

If you're anything like me, by the time you're halfway through scrolling down any of these popular "listicles", a couple of things have jumped out. 1. This was not written by a real human mom. 2. EVERYTHING, and I mean everything, costs money! 3. Almost everything requires "at least an hour" of kid-free time. Really?

So from one tired, working mom to another, let's make a list. (I say "we" because I'm really hoping you'll help me out and chime in with your ideas, ok?) Let's make a list of PRACTICAL self-care tips that actual busy, broke moms can put into practice without spending money we don't have, or lining up hours of childcare that either aren't available, or that we need to save for more urgent needs.

Here's what I've got so far:

Frugal self-care tips for busy mothers

1. Dry Brushing

Dry brushing just feels great, and is an almost instant mood lifter. It's both soothing and invigorating at the same time. While there's quite a bit of unfounded hype about both the benefits of dry brushing, and the importance doing it in a certain way, this post does a pretty good job of laying out just the facts. It's a good place to get some tips for a good routine, and get started. This is a nice choice for a good inexpensive dry brush.

2. Drink something special

I don't mean a $4 latte, I mean something other than your usual coffee and water that feels special, and makes it more fun to stay hydrated. Water kefir is cheap and easy to make, and just a couple of frozen berries can give it a wonderful flavor. Even good organic tea is pretty inexpensive, and there are probably a dozen flavors in the tea aisle that you've never tried. Know what else is cheap? Raspberry and blackberry leaves, fir needles, dandelions, creeping charlie, birch twigs, thistles, and red clover - all of which make great teas. Raspberry leaf tea is one of my favorite things right now, and since I dry my own - it's free.

3. Plant something

Just putting a single flower seed in a little dirt can be a huge boost to the spirit - especially if you're a hobbit at heart, like I am. Watching for that seed to germinate, and then enjoying its growth, can be a daily little ritual that brings a surprising amount of joy. Don't have a plant pot? That's ok - I've got a nasturtium growing in an old broken teacup right now. Just use what you have!

4. Stretch

Stretching is another great way to hit the "reset" button quickly. I always feel so much better when I take a moment to really stretch my whole body. As mothers, we're so constantly using our bodies from the moment we wake up, until we drag ourselves into bed - often carrying at least one other little body around with us. Giving ourselves a moment to acknowledge our own bodies, to feel gratitude for them, and stretch them out so we can use them more comfortably is a bit of self care we deserve every day!

5. Put your "mental load" on paper

This may seem more like emotional "heavy-lifting" than self-care, but for me, it belongs on this list. There are few things that help lift my spirits and buoy my whole sense of well-being, than taking a moment to just write down everything that's weighting down my mind. Things I need to do, conversations I need to have, worries that are bugging me...it's a very freeing activity, and just 5 minutes of doing this can go a long way to improving my day.

6. Ask for help

Speaking of writing things down...if you've just done this, take a look at that list. Chances are, there are things on that list that someone else could do, and maybe should do. Study after study after study shows that the vast majority of mothers carry a very inequitable load of household chores and childcare responsibilities - even when both parents work.

If you're consistently finding yourself in perpetual motion, never having enough hours in the day to stay on top of your to-do list, while your partner has leisure time, are there perhaps some things on your list that you can ask him to take on?

I know this is a sensitive subject, and many of you may feel this doesn't belong on a self-care list, but I'm putting in here because this is real life in 2020. Asking (with love and kindness) for a little help to make the load of providing and parenting a more even partnership feels like the definition of self-care to me, and goes a long, long way to improving daily happiness and health.

7. Do something different with your hair

You know, it's amazing what a $1 hair accessory from the dollar store can do. Seriously. Just mixing up the way you do your hair can put a bounce in your step. Try searching Pinterest for "long hair braid ideas" or easy short hairdo ideas" if you need some inspiration.

8. Pray

There's something about just hitting the pause button and connecting with the One who is our strength. Can't find the words? Try one of these prayers for overwhelmed moms.

9. Sing.

It costs nothing to put on the score from a favorite musical, and belt along with the songs. I guarantee you'll feel better. (At least until your 3-year old says, "oh Mommy, stop the singing, nooooooo!")

10. Use your essential oils

Sometimes I forget how much essential oils help to almost immediately boost my mood, and make me feel better. My favorite essential oil "fix" is this roller bottle recipe, and it's a life saver.

Read Next: Essential Oil Diffuser Blends for Spring

11. Take some deep breaths

This is a good video for getting started with deep breathing, and helping to really take some good, focused, deep breaths.

12. Read something on a real page

Maybe it's just the nerd in me, but I find myself feeling so much more "me" when I've stolen a minute to read a page or two from a real book. I don't get the same feeling of satisfaction when reading a book online. For me, even small hits of reading help improve my entire day.

13. Call a real-life friend who won't care if your kids are noisy

I know. Everyone connects via Messenger these days, right? But when was the last time you heard your best friend's voice on the phone, and felt a lump in your throat, as all the emotional shorthand of a lifetime of friendship comes rolling back? I know, you have little kids, and millennial moms don't do phone calls. But you know what? Your friend's kids are probably bellowing "MAMA, LOOK AT ME!" right now too - and neither of you are gonna mind.

14. Get outside, even just for 5 minutes

Sometimes, getting out of doors seems more trouble than it's worth, and as moms, I think we're often doing it "for the kids". But just getting outside and breathing some fresh air every day is good for both the body and the emotions.

The other day, I found myself thinking about how much I take our fresh air here in rural Maine for granted. For a lot of women, including some of you reading this, I know that fresh, toxin-free air is not what's outside the front door. It's really a gift, and thinking of it that way has given me a little extra gratitude lately, each time I walk outside.

15. Learn to do some quick reflexology on yourself

Doing some reflexology, or giving yourself a good foot massage can release pain and tension, and can feel wonderful. This video is a great place to start. My feet always feel like they're wearing out by about 3:00 in the afternoon, and this is a really effective way to get a new lease on life, just in time to make dinner.

16. Go barefoot outside

It might not always be possible to ditch your shoes when you go outside, but if you can - do it. Giving yourself permission to go barefoot, even for a few minutes a day, really has significant health benefits, including better sleep.

There's been some fascinating research on the benefits of grounding, including this study, which was published in 2015.

Grounding appears to improve sleep, normalize the day–night cortisol rhythm, reduce pain, reduce stress, shift the autonomic nervous system from sympathetic toward parasympathetic activation, increase heart rate variability, speed wound healing, and reduce blood viscosity.

Oschman, James L et al. “The effects of grounding (earthing) on inflammation, the immune response, wound healing, and prevention and treatment of chronic inflammatory and autoimmune diseases.” Journal of inflammation research vol. 8 83-96. 24 Mar. 2015, doi:10.2147/JIR.S69656

17. Pick wildflowers

My mother in law is wonderful about this. In the summer months, her kitchen table is always dressed with a beautiful bouquet of wildflower. They're totally free, they're bright, beautiful, and they cheer up everyone who sees them.

18. Remind yourself of a favorite compliment

Take a minute to dig back into your memory for a time when someone gave you a complement that really meant something to you, and let yourself dwell on it a bit. I don't mean this in a narcissistic way. Sometimes I think in our younger years, people see strengths in us that we're not ready to own or recognize. I believe it can be worth remembering the strengths people have recognized in us, and taking time to own them, and foster their growth in the person we're continuing to become.

Read Next: 23 Ways to Turn Around a Bad {Mom} Day

Alright - that's what I've got so far. I hope you might find some of these self-care tips both practical and helpful. Now, how about you?

Do you have any other quick and inexpensive self-care tips for our list? Share them in the comments below!